Some Foolish Questions Theists Ask

I came across some questions on Pinterest the other day and made a half-sarcastic comment, providing answers to the questions. I have had a good reaction to what I mostly wrote in fun, so thought I would add it here as well. I think it may have been done in parody of the way theists try to convince atheists of god, but I can attest that I have had people ask me almost all of them in earnest.

The questions:

1. Can you explain what happens when we die?
2. If we came from monkeys, then why are there still monkeys living today?
3. Is it okay to commit murders, rape, homosexuality, going to stripbars, looking at pornography, and other forms of rebellion if you think there is no God to guide you?
4. How can you explain the way a banana fits in the palm of the hand?
5. If Fox News is a dishonest channel, then why are the reporters such as Bill O’Reilly true Christians?
6. Did you know that there are biblical records of dinosaurs that were witnessed by men?
7. How did pond scum turn into us?
8. How did the eye form?
9. How did the Grand Canyon form?
10. If you call yourself an atheist in regards to God, then do you call yourself an atheist in regards to Santa and Bigfoot?
11. How did everything come from nothing?
12. If evolution is true, how come we never see frogs turn into birds?
13. Have you heard of the Shroud of Turin?

My original remarks:

1. We decompose.
2. We don't come from monkeys, we share a common ancestor with monkeys (Google it).
3. Going to strip bars, being homosexual, and looking at pornography are not forms of rebellion. People are gay, some people like sexual entertainment. Nothing wrong with that. Obviously, it is not OK to murder and rape. I don't know any society that has ever condoned either one as part of their constitution.
4. Umm, it is pretty easy to hold something that small in your hand. The opposable thumb helps.
5. There are many dishonest Christians in the world.
6. If you have documentation that there are biblical records of dinosaurs that were witnessed by men, I would love to see it. Dinosaurs became extinct about 65 million years ago, humans came on the scene about 4 million years ago.
7. I don't know of any scientific evidence that states pond scum turned into humans.
8. The eye forms in the same way other parts of the human body does, cells divide and organize into the various component parts of the body. The eye is no different from another body part in that respect.
9. Erosion and other natural forces formed it over billions of years. That is pretty much basic geology.
10. Of course, I don't believe anything exists if there is no evidence for its existing.
11. Everything didn't come from nothing, that is not possible.
12. Because that is not how evolution works. Again, Google it.
13. Yes. It is one of thousands of relics created by the church in order to try to get people to believe the myths they were trying to inculcate into society as truths. It takes advantage of the psychological phenomenon known as pareidolia, wherein vague and random stimulus (often an image) is perceived as significant. Common examples include seeing images of animals or faces in clouds, the man in the moon, etc.

I would like to change my answer to #10. I do not call myself an "atheist" in regard to Santa and Bigfoot. Neither of those is a god, and an atheist does not believe in gods. However, I do not believe in Santa and Bigfoot for the same reason I do not believe in god - there is no evidence of them existing either and plenty of documentation of the mythology of them.

Here is another blogger who spent more time on the answers than I did in my original spur-of-the-moment Pinterest comment: Scribbles and Rants: Clever Questions to Ask an Atheist, provided the Atheist has a Severe Head Injury

I would love to hear you own responses - real or silly - in the comments.